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Doctor Who: Last of the Time Lords/First Days
This is the third episode of Doctor Who: Last of the Time Lords. Plot Katherine: The opposite? We're in the past? You better fix the tortoise soon, I need to get home! Doctor: Oh, it's fine, we just need to go out of the TARDIS for a minute and contact Vastra. Katherine: Vastra who? Doctor: Oh, she's a friend of mine who lives in Victorian London. Katherine: So, we're in Victorian London? Doctor: No... That won't happen for another few million years... We're in the Mesozoic Era! Katherine: WHAT? Doctor: Oh, it's not a problem. I'll be able to fix the TARDIS, I just need to borrow Jupiter for a minute, and- Katherine: BORROW JUPITER? Doctor: Yes, yes, I'll have to put the Silurians on Jupiter temporarily to avoid the inevitable extinction of Dinosauria. I've already contacted the planet, so it should be arriving soon. Also, you might want to wear a coat, after all, it is chilly outside because the sun isn't close to Earth in this point in time. Katherine: How are you going to borrow Jupiter? Doctor: Well, you see, Jupiter is actually the size of a, say, very small planet at this point in time, but the Silurians will help it grow, so the gravity won't affect Earth too much... I hope. Katherine: YOU HOPE? Doctor: Oh, did I say that part out loud? Anyways, let's get out of the TARDIS. They both get out of the TARDIS, which is eaten by a Tyrannosaurus Rex the second they get out. Doctor: Well, that's not the first time that's happened... Theme song plays. Katherine: How are we going to- Doctor: Relax! It's the end of the Cretaceous period, so extinction should be soon! Katherine: How is that supposed to help us? Doctor: Well... I always meant to go back in time and watch the extinction of the dinosaurs, but the Earth was moving rapidly, and- oh, no... Katherine: Oh no what? Doctor: This, you see, is a very large Tyrannosaurus, but it's actually very small for a large Tyrannosaurus. You see, dinosaurs... This must sound strange, buts I assume their bones aren't as big as their actual body... There is a subspecies of dinosaurs that look a lot smaller than this, and it's a very small subspecies, and their bones actually do fit their bodies- GREAT MUSTARD! I've got it! Katherine: You've got what? Doctor: That's why he wanted to steal them... The dinosaurs on the spaceship... They were more rare than any other dinosaurs, so he stole them! He stole an entire subspecies! Well, except for the first Tyrannasaurus that ate the TARDIS, I stole that one... Katherine: No idea what you're talking about, but let's go ahead and find this "Vastra" friend of yours. Tyrannosaurus: Where are you going, Doctor? Doctor: What? Tyrannosaurus: We must reach the sun. Doctor: The sun? Why would you want to reach the sun? Tyrannosaurus: You have summoned transportation, Doctor. Doctor: Transportation? What- Wait, reach the sun? What planet do you originate from? Tyrannosaurus: Pluto. Doctor: You're aliens! You're all aliens! Your bones are as big as your body, you just shrink the closer you get to the sun! Tyrannosaurus: Now, Doctor, you know who we are. Katherine: How do you know who he is? Tyrannosaurus: He warned us. Doctor: Who's he? Tyrannosaurus: We do not know who he is, but he showed us who you are. Doctor: What am I? Tyrannosaurus: You are dangerous, and you must be destroyed. Katherine: So, are those dinosaurs or aliens? I'm confused. Doctor: Katherine, I think dinosaurs are aliens. Katherine: Should I run? Tyrannosaurus: Yes... Run! RUN AS FAST AS YOU CAN! *roars* Doctor: No! Don't move an inch! Katherine: I'm not trying to! Doctor: You just asked me if you should have! Katherine: Well... Actually, you do have a point... Doctor: I never thought that dinosaurs were killed by anything claimed by the theory... Tyrannosaurus, have you got a name? Tyrannosaurus: London. Doctor: Your name is London? Your voice doesn't sound female! Tyrannosaurus: What is a female to sound like, Doctor? Our species sounds different than yours. Katherine: *screams* Doctor: *turns around* Katherine? Where did you go? A young female Silurian walks up to the Doctor. Doctor: What's your name, little girl? Vastra: Vastra. My name is Vastra. What are you? Doctor: I'm the Doctor, and I'll be needing your assistance! Vastra: A doctor? Sir, Ireland and the other triceratopses are screaming about some extinction. Can you help them? Doctor: Ireland? That's an odd name for a triceratops. Do you know any stegasauri named United States? Vastra: Oh, Doctor, don't be silly, United States is a megalodon. Doctor: Well, I do know that you will be a good Silurian some day. You will help me very much. Vastra: Thank you, but I'm not like the other Silurians. I like to discover things. I don't think that will help at all. Doctor: I don't know about here, but in Katherine's time, life is all about discovering, to scientists at least. Vastra: Could you help Ireland? Doctor: Do you know where my friend Katherine is? She's about this tall, long hair, screams the word "Doctor," thinks my time machine is an animal similar to a turtle, is very scared of London over there, has been wearing a purple sweater for three days- Vastra: You mean the thing I just discovered? Doctor: Probably, but somebody already "discovered" her way before you did- well, after you did, but that's how time travel works. Vastra: Well, follow me! The Doctor follows Vastra into a hole. Katherine: *yelling* DOCTOR! Doctor: Katherine, relax! You were just kidnapped by Vastra. Katherine: So, should I not be worried? Doctor: No, probably not. By the way, I'm going to need to put all of you on Jupiter. I phoned the Space Orientation and Link of Extreme Magnetics Network, or, as you may know it, the SOLEMN, to, well, quickly fill Jupiter with metal and attract it with a really powerful magnet. Vastra: Why? Doctor: So you Silurians can avoid extinction! Vastra: But what about the dinosaurs? Doctor: I'm afraid they'll have to go. I'm sorry, Vastra, but extinction is inevitable... Suddenly, Jupiter arrives near Earth and shoots it toward the sun rapidly. Doctor: What's happening? Katherine: Doctor, I think Jupiter is larger than you thought it was, and now its atmosphere is shooting the Earth toward the sun! Doctor: That's actually pretty likely... Oh! I just pieced this all together! Katherine: What? Doctor: Jupiter gets bigger the closer it comes to the sun, so it's like the opposite of dinosaurs! However, I think it may have stopped growing when the atmosphere collided with the Earth... And the extinction of the dinosaurs- the Earth is moving so fast that they can't shrink enough in time, so the sun just makes them burn! No need for the Silurians to go to Jupiter- extinction is done with! The earth settles in place. Katherine: That's actually very clever! Now the Earth is the correct distance from the sun! Doctor: Yep! And since the Tyrannasaurus burned down, the TARDIS must have come out with its bones... After all, that big thing couldn't digest it that quick. Anyways, see you in Victorian London, Vastra! The Doctor grabs Katherine and runs back to the TARDIS. Vastra: London? Like the Tyrannosaurus? The Doctor and Katherine are in the TARDIS. Katherine: Well, I guess this is the end of our adventures then! Take me home now, please. Doctor: No. Katherine: What? Doctor: I said, no! NEXT TIME... Doctor: Nobody steps in or out of this TARDIS until I figure out why it keeps glitching. Katherine: Grab the FLIPCAE and jump! Doctor: The TARDIS has become the world's deadliest spider, spinning its web through time! Strax: Kill the Vortex Web! Steven: There's no need for the Vortex Web, we must get rid of it! Rassilon: Doctor, what is the Vortex Web doing in our pocket universe? Kate Stewart: Come on, Doctor, tell us what you're going to do with that Vortex Web or I will! Doctor: The Vortex Web. Category:Stories featuring the Twelfth Doctor